Hello fellow Souls. I’m just checking in with you as we have the “Love Day” approaching and I wanted to get this to you. We know that Valentine's Day is usually seen as a time for couples – some newly together, when the Love Bonds are new and still rosy. Some are the lucky folks that have been together for years and I really admire that! But what about all the single people out there? What is your plan for the most loved “Day of the Year”, when people are planning a fancy date, glowing with candles, soft music and superb wine..?
Well, I will tell you what. The most important person to love is you! This is about the importance of self-love.
For starters:
- Self-love is all about realising how wonderful you actually are. Take a quiet moment and look at yourself as if you were looking at someone else. Think about what you were like as a child, picture an old photograph or if you have one – hold it in your hand and see that child as if it were your own. Send loving thoughts to that small you and give them a sincere hug. Tell them that you are so proud of who they have become. Learning to value and appreciate yourself is the first step towards self-love. It involves self-respect, self-acceptance, and putting yourself and your well-being first. We have been brought up in a world where we are taught that selflessness is the right way, but I think that somewhere in all of that, many of us have lost ourselves, and many don’t see the wonderful beings that they are, capable of achieving more. When you are more, you can give more. It’s a fact! You are more able to give with compassion and kindness if your own cup is full. And who better to fill it than you – because you know what you need.
Then:
- Once you really experience that connection with yourself, you will find that you will feel more self-confident. The picture of your life will swell in front of your eyes, and you will feel able to do anything. People will start to see you with new eyes as your confidence emanates from you and they will be drawn to that magic feeling. It’s infectious. You will start attracting new and like-minded people to you – those who want to bask in your good energy. It’s hard to resist a magnet.
- Practicing self-love will help you manage stress better by promoting self-care and relaxation. Instead of thinking how you would spoil someone else, spoil yourself with that bubble bath, soft lighting, music you love and a glass of what you really love. Give your feet that loving touch with a good massage and thank them for always being there for you, relentlessly getting you wherever you want to go. Treat yourself to a day with a full facial skin care routine. Male or female, we all need this. A spa is a real spoil, but there is nothing like doing this at home with a special movie thrown in to relax you. Don’t be shy – take yourself out for a gourmet meal – who knows, perhaps the waiter/waitress turns out to be your next date. If you never go out, your chances of meeting that special person become more remote. And don’t forget that new-found confidence and the irresistible smile. Another relaxation method is just taking the day off to catch up on reading time, curl up on your couch with a cup of hot chocolate to get the brain stimulated to release those feel-good endorphins. If it’s your idea of a fun day, take off to the store for a little retail therapy. Buy that little something you have been wanting for a while. Or, if you are now feeling the new energy of the “new you”, pack your hiking gear and head off into the bright blue. The world’s your oyster. Breathe in the sun, lie on the grounding Earth. Feel the connection to your roots. You will come home feeling rejuvenated and renewed. Practising mindfulness is also a good way to reduce stress and continually remind yourself of how grateful you are for everything you have. Gratefulness has a funny way of making you feel really happy. Write something nice about yourself and put it in a place where you will see it often. It’s a reminder to value yourself.
- When you value yourself, you will start to make choices that are good for you. You will start to put your well-being first. After all it is your body and your mind you have to live with. Honour it. Love it. The decisions you make regarding others may change too. You may decide to put different personal boundaries in place, to maintain healthier relationships. Learning to say “no” to others can be a challenge for many of us but may be the right thing to do in a particular situation. Forget all the negative internal narrative and consciously replace those thoughts with positive affirmations – you will be surprised how quickly it becomes your reality.
- Above all else really embrace self-love—it's the root for the basis of a fulfilling and balanced life.
To be honest, Valentine's Day is a great opportunity to focus on self-love and self-appreciation. Don’t be discouraged as good habits require patience and dedication. And really, it shouldn’t be only one day of the year, but a daily practice that you never ever feel guilty about. You deserve love and kindness from yourself and everyone else. Happy Valentine’s Day!
